My Biggest Regret in My Marriage | 'To Have and To Hold' Series

There are many moments of our marriage that I look back on with regret. Things I said. Things I did, or didn't, do. Actions that hurt Cal. Emotional temper tantrums. The list goes on, but we all have those things. I thought long and hard about my biggest regret in our nearly eight years of marriage. It was difficult isolating one as the "biggest"...until I actually realized what it was. 

My biggest regret is that we didn't take on life as a team for so long. I'm having a hard time expressing in words what I mean, so bear with me for a minute. When we found our there were problems with our pregnancy, something changed with us. We became partners. We started to face the world together, as one unit. Sure, I've always felt like we were on the same side, but not like this. We went to battle together. We felt sorrow together. We planned our next steps together. We truly became one in our hardship. 

Bad things happen to everyone. A failed pregnancy. A family member dies. When one of you loses a job. Your house forecloses. You go through a major surgery. Financial loss. When you receive more bad new than you know what to do with. Those things show you just how much you need one another. Our particular circumstances made me understand the words, "For better or worse." 

 So, my regret is that it took me a ridiculously difficult time to take my husband's hand and say, "Whatever you got, world, we can take it." Don't wait until the hard part comes to start living and acting like your backs are against the wall and the only way you can do it is together.